Guard Your Community

So then we pursue the things which make for peace and the building up of one another. Romans 14:19

I am sure I am not alone when it comes to being hurt in relationships. Even in, or especially in, those relationships that are dearest to us. They must be guarded and they take intentionality as we grow and develop. But sometimes words are said and taken the wrong way. Or actions are misinterupted. We allow little things to effect our relationship. We let our insecurities overwhelm us and they are allowed to fester and grow. Instead of just going to the person and talk it out we believe the lies we tell ourselves.

I know, because I have done it far too often. I have allowed small petty things to ruin, or almost ruin a relationship. I have taken a look from a friend and assumed she must be upset with me. An unreturned phone call or text as we are growing apart or even she's tired of me. So many lies. So many insecurities.

But you know what? God calls us to community, even when it's messy. I have learned that in order to guard my relationships I need to be honest even if my honesty is uncomfortable. Time after time I have gone to people and shared I my insecurities, the lies I had believed about our relationship. I have asked them if we are okay. To be honest this has not been easy. It's very difficult. What if everything I've felt is true? More often than not it's been my own crazy imgination.

In the process of doing this though I have learned some very valuable lessons. I have found that if I can remember these 3 things my relationships, and therefore my community, is unified. Also, these three things are good reminders when it comes to our relationship with God...you know, those times we doubt how He feels about us.

We need to remember...

Who they have been in the past. Remind yourself of circumstances, and life decisions that have spoken of their character. Be reminded of their consistency in choices and the living out of life in Christ.

Their heart. Remember those times they've shared their heart with you. Go back and list all the things you know to be true about this person. Their love for God, for others, for you. How they have been there for you. Loved you. Invested in you.

Who our enemy is. Remember that we fight the same enemy and that enemy would do anything to stop the work that is being done in God’s kingdom. He loves nothing more than to create friction and undercurrents in order to divide the body of Christ. He doesn’t want God’s people getting along. He hates unity in the family of God and will do anything to stop it. Choose to rejoice that Christ’s love won and the enemy was defeated in this battle.

My dear sisters, we need to guard the unity among us. We need to fight for community. It's so easy to let things slide. To let our insecurities speak lies. God's desire for each of us is to love one another. To get along with one another, not just get in our own small communities but with all believers.

Perhaps you are far better at this than I am. Perhaps you don't need this reminder, but I know I do and I am pretty sure there are a lot that are like me. So can I ask you to join me in choosing to go to that person (or to God) immediately when you have doubts, no matter how small or petty you think your insecurities or doubts are? Can we value communty over looking foolish?

Let us all remember to guard our relationships with our brothers and sister in Christ. Let us remember that we all fight the same battle…the same enemy.

What about you? Are you willing to go to your friend, your brother or sister in Christ, your pastor, Bible study leader or church leadership and fight for community. Are you willing to humble yourself and die to pride so that the body of Christ will be guarded? Will you, at all cost, protect the community of Christ against an enemy that seeks to destroy?

Who do you need to talk to today?

Therefore if there is any encouragement in Christ, if there is any consolation of love, if there is any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and compassion, make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose. Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves ; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. Phil 2:1-4